Love implies anger. The person who is angered by nothing cares about nothing.
August is the most brutal of the months. I can’t say I’m sad to see it go.
Back in Texas, it’s now common for temperatures to stay above 100 degrees (38 for my new euro pals) for more than two weeks straight and here in Europe, many are suffering from unprecedented heat waves and drought that test the power grid and dwindling water supplies. Wildfires rage around the globe and last week, the Amazonian rainforest, known as the lungs of the earth, was ravaged in flames. Meanwhile, the president of the United States grinned while his wife held a newly orphaned baby whose parents were killed in a massacre that took place in my home state. A massacre carried out in the name of the immigrant takeover of the US, ironically by a man of European decent against people actually native to the Americas. It fucking rained micro plastics in the Rocky Mountains last week. Here in southern Portugal, many of the wells used for generations by the farmers and ranchers have gone dry while the endless green golf courses glisten shamelessly behind tall walls. We also got a glimpse of group panic at the threat of gasoline and diesel scarcity when petrol workers went on strike earlier this month. There were endless lines at the pump and gas was being rationed down to 15 liters per car.
Some people think that winter is the harshest season, but in winter, the earth just sleeps. In August, the earth gets angry.
“Wilderness is not a luxury but a necessity of the human spirit, and as vital to our lives as water and good bread. A civilization which destroys what little remains of the wild, the spare, the original, is cutting itself off from its origins and betraying the principle of civilization itself.”
August brought me a bout of depression and face to face with old grief manifested in some familiar tendencies: criticism, emotional isolation, angry impatience, lethargy, diminished libido. It’s among the greatest mysteries of life that we should be so loved despite our determination to at times act so unlovely. Six years ago, also in August, my sister killed herself. She told me once in an email that she had always known that I was, by nature, an inconsiderate person and for years before and after her death, these words haunted me as if a gruesome truth about me had been cast in stone for all eternity. I remember other words people I love have used to describe me: neurotic, competitive, impatient, intense, blunt, morbid….and I think about why I immediately consider these things not only to be wholly true but also utterly negative. It isn’t hard in this life to start feeling helpless. In those sad, dark days and nights we are somehow responsible for all the world’s problems yet too insignificant to make any meaningful change. Guilt abounds and at it worst, it shuts people down completely.
I’ve spent much of my free-time this month trying to transmute my shadow energy into good things for the future: prepping for the fall garden, sketching ideas for a new mural and studying everything plant medicine, the biochemistry and neurophysiology of mind/body medicine, and the psychology of eros. And of course I practice my bodywork. Be with the anger but keep moving forward. Acknowledge that frustration, rage and sadness can be rational responses and have something to feed me, but do not let them completely determine the outcome or my total perspective.
“The love of wilderness is more than a hunger for what is always beyond reach; it is also an expression of loyalty to the earth, the earth which bore us and sustains us, the only paradise we shall ever know, the only paradise we ever need, if only we had the eyes to see.”
After all, hope remains. August is the month I first conceived new life. It’s the month that one life passed and other came to be…. Phoenix, out from the ashes… the embodiment of life longing for itself. I think about my kid, my family, my friends and take good hard look around at all the beauty in the world. Time to get my head of my ass and get moving again. For my own morale I’ve compiled a list of lifestyle choices I’ve made that make me happy and contribute to the good and healing of the world and it’s people:
Planting trees- One of our first acts of resilience upon moving into our place here in Portugal was to plant a dozen new trees. We are also in phase 1 of planting dozens of perennial herbs, berries and flowering shrubs that will beautify the landscape, provide food for pollinators and provide us with food and medicine.
Growing a garden and intentionally sourcing food from local growers- organically when possible.
Composting- rethinking “waste”. Rebuilding depleted soil.
Dedicating my life to connecting people to nature and to their natural wisdom through writing, homesteading arts, embodiment work, pleasure activism and plant wisdom. Building a business plan that is inclusive and egalitarian.
Speaking my truth - telling my story, actively listening to others’. Looking for patterns, making connections.
Seeking out local projects and offerings in practices that move me to action: reforestation, permaculture, dance, sacred sexuality, ethnobotany, etc
Keeping my reading list diverse, engaging, relevant and inspiring.
Farm Camp- continuing the mission of connecting families to their local land and foods through child wisdom
Increasing my use and knowledge of natural medicines and products and supporting companies who do the same
Staying aware of and engaged in social and political issues and trends.
Raising a steward of the earth and it’s people- understanding that we pass down our traumas, ailments, habits and biases, but that we also have the opportunity to change the genetic code, heal what was given to us and nurture a generation that is intentional, aware, compassionate and inspired.
“I despise my own nation most. Because I know it best. Because I still love it, suffering from Hope. For me, that's patriotism.”
Here are a few things I’m interested in but haven’t yet had the bandwidth/opportunity to get too deep into. If you have some resources, let me know.
Resources on community housing trusts
Sex positive resources for children and families
Opportunities to study ethnobotany and bodywork with folx from the African/latin/indigenous diaspora or resources thereof.
Resistance is fertile, my friends, and the battle for social and environmental evolution is fought on many fronts. Remember, “The plain fact is that the planet does not need more successful people. But it does desperately need more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers, and lovers of every kind. It needs people who live well in their places. It needs people of moral courage willing to join the fight to make the world habitable and humane. And these qualities have little to do with success as we have defined it.” If you’re reading this, talk to me. Tell me, what are you passionate about? How do you love to nurture the seeds of positive change? Let me know you’re out there and how you stay clear-headed and eyes-wide-open. When we dedicate time to doing what we love, we can access flow- that altered state of consciousness that eases anxiety, anger, apathy and disillusionment. Here, our bodies and minds are creative and we activate our innate ability to persevere, solve problems and birth beauty from chaos. We feel alive and connected and begin to see all the beauty worth fighting for. And then, we are less willing to tolerate destruction, greed, corruption and injustice. Then, we work harder to build what we love instead of just fighting what we hate.
To keep the momentum going, here are a few recent news stories (compiled by a true love of mine, Rob Brezsney) that you might have missed:
Spain said it would create a new marine wildlife reserve for the migrations of whales and dolphins in the Mediterranean and will prohibit all future fossil fuels exploration in the area.
Following "visionary" steps by Belize, UNESCO removed the Belize Barrier Reef, the second largest in the world, from its list of endangered World Heritage Sites.
Colombia officially expanded the Serranía de Chiribiquete (also known as The Cosmic Village of the Jaguars) to 4.3 million hectares, making it the largest protected tropical rainforest national park in the world.
Mexico said its population of wild jaguars, the largest feline in the Americas, grew by 20% in the past eight years, and 14 Latin American countries signed an agreement to implement a regional conservation program for the big cats through 2030.
In the forests of central Africa, the population of mountain gorillas, one of the world’s most endangered species, was reported to have increased by 25% since 2010, to over 1,000 individuals.
Canada signed another conservation deal with its First Nations people, creating the largest protected boreal forest (an area twice the size of Belgium) on the planet.
Chile passed a new law protecting the waters along its coastline, creating nine marine reserves and increasing the area of ocean under state protection from 4.3% to 42.4%.
The Seychelles created a new 130,000 square kilometer marine reserve in the Indian Ocean, protecting their waters from illegal fishing for generations to come.
New Caledonia agreed to place 28,000 square kilometers of its ocean waters under protection, including some of the world’s most pristine coral reefs.
“Saving the world is only a hobby. Most of the time I do nothing.”
Let’s build on this, shall we? Let’s make a threefold pact for the month of September:
For every demoralizing news story we read, we’ll find another that illustrates bold and brave work being done locally or across the globe.
We’ll cut our passive social media consumption down by half and use our time saved to nurture our passions.
We will reach out to at least three people in our community of friends, families and comrades and ask them to share with us about their, passions, about what moves them, inspires them and gives them hope.
Who’s with me?
One of my favorite phrases Ive recently learned is “radical discontinuity”. It’s an intentional breaking of personal patterns designed to disrupt the default mode network, stimulate our senses and make us awake and aware. Let our pact be an act of solidarity and a welcomed relief to a certain monotony that seeps into our lives. Let it be an opportunity for the callousness of the August heat to crack us open and let forth the rains of compassion and tides transformation.
Chins up and hearts open, my loves. May our life-work be bold, spirited and a worthy inheritance for the future ancestors.
“One final paragraph of advice: do not burn yourselves out. Be as I am - a reluctant enthusiast....a part-time crusader, a half-hearted fanatic. Save the other half of yourselves and your lives for pleasure and adventure. It is not enough to fight for the land; it is even more important to enjoy it. While you can. While it’s still here. So get out there and hunt and fish and mess around with your friends, ramble out yonder and explore the forests, climb the mountains, bag the peaks, run the rivers, breathe deep of that yet sweet and lucid air, sit quietly for a while and contemplate the precious stillness, the lovely, mysterious, and awesome space. Enjoy yourselves, keep your brain in your head and your head firmly attached to the body, the body active and alive, and I promise you this much; I promise you this one sweet victory over our enemies, over those desk-bound men and women with their hearts in a safe deposit box, and their eyes hypnotized by desk calculators. I promise you this; You will outlive the bastards.”
PS: All caption quotes are courtesy of the late, great Edward Abbey